To grow at the expense of others is an extraordinary blunder

The second we locked eyes I saw that you knew and my heart sunk. My hands grew clammy and I forced out a ‘good morning baby, how did you sleep?’ not yet ready to confront reality.

‘who is she?’ you ask.

‘who is who?’ I shoot back.

‘you know who I'm talking about James, who is she?’.

Our connection should have been enough for me to not avoid the issue but lately I have been lost in the fear of rightful consequence and so I respond -

‘What does it matter, you know this is dying, stop lying to yourself’

‘James…’ you choke out

And the damage was done. A prolonged argument follows filled with futile pleas for love and a hundred unheard words. I learned my lesson quickly and promised to be better. You learned your lesson quickly and step light as a feather.

The days that follow are cold, empty and drag along like pulling a stick through the mud. the trust is rebuilt through actions as words have become empty and you deserve to trust again.

Slowly the days grow warm, short goodbyes replaced with long embraces, time apart turns to time together and I re-enter your good graces. I am forever grateful to have experienced your capacity for love as it has fundamentally changed how I interact with the people around me. Empathy has formed my deepest connections and while it has led to its fair share of hurt, because of you, I will always embrace it.

you taught me how to love, thank you.